Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Trust the Universe


I'm kind of a control freak. Don't look so shocked! Surely you knew this about me?

Over time I've found that the Universe has this annoyingly cheerful way of providing me with countless opportunities to learn the same lesson over and over again until it finally sinks in. Here's how it goes:

Universe: (presents something to me) Are you ready to deal with this? 
Me: Nope, not yet. 
Universe: Okay!

...time passes...

Universe: How 'bout now? Ready yet?
Me: Nope.
Universe: Okay!

...more time passes...

Universe: How 'bout now? Ready now?
Me: Definitely NOT now.
Universe: Okay!

...and so on and so on until FINALLY, I decide that I'm ready to deal with whatever glorious lesson the Universe wants me to learn.


As a control freak, the big lesson that I keep having the opportunity to learn is "Trust the Universe" or, for the religious folks out there "Trust God." Me, I'll take the Universe option...it rings truer in my brain.

What this looks like right now is me knowing, not just in my brain but in my heart, that everything ALWAYS works out. It may not look like I think it should, and it may not look like I want it to look, but really, it all works out exactly the way it's supposed to.

When I'm planning my husband's 40th birthday party and can't find a suitable venue after searching for a month, it will all work out.

When I get my period after our eighth month of attempted baby-making (doh!), it will all work out.

When I'm still getting horrible headaches even after almost seven weeks of upper-chiro treatment, it will all work out.

And deep down inside, I know it will, because it always has. I just have a hard time remembering sometimes, that's all. And so I know that the Universe will keep providing me with opportunities to remember. Thank you, Universe! :)


Monday, April 1, 2013

Ultimate Blog Challenge!

The Universe has a funny (and awesome!) way of supporting me in having what I say I want.

I haven't been writing much lately, which has come up twice in the last week. The first time was last Tuesday, on a follow-up call with my winter writing group. I admitted to not doing a whole lot of writing, and noted that my coach and I were working on my schedule for April, and that I could incorporate time to write while doing so (which I didn't).

The second time was today in my call with my coach, when I owned up to not scheduling any writing time in my April schedule. My coach and I talked quite a bit about writing and in the end I committed to writing nightly (for the next week) about one thing I am grateful for in my life.

Fast forward a couple of hours and I'm trolling around on Facebook when I see my friend Deb post something about the Ultimate Blog Challenge, which started today. What's this? I asked myself, and did a Google search to find out.


A 30-day blogging challenge! Just what I need to get back into the groove of writing!! Thank you, Universe, for looking out for my needs and thank you, Facebook, for giving the Universe a way to communicate with me!

I hesitated for a few seconds before signing up. Do I really want to commit to 30 days of blog writing? Is this a good month for me to do so? Should I write on my personal blog or my coaching blog, or both? After all the necessary(?) hesitating was done, I signed up. Woohoo!

So fasten your seat belts and hold on...it's gonna be a fun month!! :)  Day one, DONE! Who wants to join me?

Monday, February 18, 2013

What Happens When Your Head's Not Screwed On Straight



A couple of weekends ago I was at a coach training, and I met this really cool lady who told me about how her head is literally not screwed on straight. She was having these chronic headaches for a few years and had seen a chiropractor and a physical therapist to no avail. She ended up going to see an upper cervical chiropractor who did some x-rays of her head and saw that her skull wasn't sitting on her atlas correctly, which could cause the headaches. At the time that she told me about this, she had been in treatment for about a month and was already having fewer headaches.

As she was telling me this, it was all sounding very familiar. The chronic headaches, the pain in the back of the head, the inability of other professionals to help ease the pain...

The Monday after that weekend, I Googled upper cervical chiropractors in San Diego and found one that I liked the look of. I got in to see them the next day for an evaluation. As part of the evaluation, they asked a lot of standard questions about the pain that I experience: how long has it been going on, how severe is it, how does it interfere with my life, etc.

What I realized from that appointment is that I've really compartmentalized how much pain I deal with. Most people (possibly including you) have no idea that I've had these chronic headaches for several years. It's not something I really talk about, unless you're in a helping profession and I'm hoping you can make the pain go away. And even then, I may downplay it. Mostly I just deal with the pain, take Advil when I need it, and go about my business.

But as I sat there describing all of the symptoms and details to the chiropractor, I found myself on the verge of tears. I think that in that moment I finally allowed myself to grasp and acknowledge how much pain I deal with, and how it affects my life. I sometimes joke about how the only thing that seems like it would bring relief from the headaches would be to have someone pound an ice pick into the back of my skull. As my physical therapist says, it's not normal to want that.

It was gratifying to find out that there is actually something going on with my neck/head. Things are rotated and tilted in ways that they shouldn't be. And not only are there arteries that carry blood to my brain that are possibly being squooshed, there could be all sorts of other things (including my jaw issues) being caused by these imbalances. The good news? It's FIXABLE!!! I've started treatment, and will be going three times a week for the next 6-8 weeks and should hopefully start to feel some relief soon.

So here's to getting my head screwed back on straight, and getting rid of the chronic pain once and for all!!

(Photo Source)

Monday, January 28, 2013

Coaching Really DOES Work!

Well, duh, right? I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be a life coach if I didn't believe that.This is really more of a reminder for me than a revelation.

For the last few months of 2012 I was in the "intellectual pursuit of coaching" (as Marni likes to say), meaning I was caught up in (or...stuck in??) the details and business end of coaching. As such, I've felt pretty disconnected from coaching itself.

In the last few weeks I've joined a coaching circle with some colleagues, so I'm both coaching someone and being coached by someone else. Additionally, I've started coaching a few of my friends for the fun (and practice!) of it.

From both sides of the coaching relationship, I'm reminded that having someone call you on your shit and hold you accountable for what you say you want in your life is extremely effective! I'm watching the friends that I'm coaching making great progress toward their goals, which is awesome and very gratifying. And on my own end, I'm seeing forward motion in areas that I've been super stuck on for months! (Hooray!!)

Here's the thing about coaching. You have to be willing to play full out and be a little uncomfortable in order for things to change. If you show up ready to push yourself, look at what's stopping you, and be held accountable, it's amazing what can happen!

Very excited to be back in the swing of things!! :)

(Photo Source)

Monday, January 21, 2013

Scary Moments

I watched my husband get in an accident yesterday. It was scary as hell.

We'd left the house about the same time, me in the car and him on the scooter which he hadn't ridden in probably a month because of the cold weather. We pulled up to the left turn signal to get onto Mira Mesa Blvd. from our street, him in the inside left turn lane, me in the outside left turn lane.

Both of us were in the front of our lanes, and when our light turned green, we both started to turn left. At the same time, there were two cars on the opposite side of the street turning right onto Mira Mesa Blvd., and they both turned right on red, just as we were turning left at our green light. The woman in the outermost right turn lane turned across three lanes into the lane that Donovan had just turned left into, and she almost hit him. He managed not to get hit, but lost control of the scooter and went down, rolling over a few times after he hit the ground.

I watched all this happen.

I had seen the two cars turning right on red as I started to turn left, and I watched as the woman almost hit my husband, and then I watched as my husband hit the ground and rolled several times. I doubt that I'll ever be able to erase that image from my mind.

I had no idea what to do, and was scared out of my wits. I stopped my car in the middle of the lane and just honked my horn for what seemed like forever. I watched as Donovan lay on the ground for probably no more than two or three seconds, but I'm telling you it seemed like an hour.

With the help of some good Samaritans, we managed to get the scooter out of the road and got Donovan and my car off to the side. The woman who had almost hit Donovan had stopped a few hundred feet down the street but never got out of her car to see what happened. After a couple of minutes, she took off. One of the women who had stopped to help us took off after her and said she would bring her back.

We did our best to assess the damage to Donovan in the meantime. His jeans had ripped at the knee, where he had a big abrasion, his right hand was all scraped up on top, and the palm of his left hand was banged up pretty good. The thing that worried me most was that he said his chest hurt right in the middle and he'd had a little difficulty breathing at first.

I rinsed out his wounds with my water bottle as best I could, and it belatedly occurred to me that we should call the police. Donovan wouldn't let me call 911 since it wasn't an emergency, so I called the local police number. I was waiting to get through to someone when I saw a cop turning right onto Mira Mesa Blvd. I flagged him down and explained what had happened. He wasn't thrilled at first since he had been on his way to respond to another call, but he stayed and helped us anyway.

Our good Samaritan did in fact catch the woman who almost hit Donovan and brought her back to the scene. A HUGE thank you to her because without her we didn't have so much as a license plate number. What an amazing thing to do for a total stranger!! I hugged her before she left and she told me that she has a husband too, and she couldn't imagine what she would do if she saw him get in an accident.

To make a long story short (too late!), we did eventually get Donovan to Urgent Care. They x-rayed his knees and his chest (all good), cleaned out some of his wounds, gave him a prescription for Vicodin and sent us on our way (after about three hours). He's sore, and has some pretty bad pain in the knee area, and we didn't sleep much last night (thank God for HBO on Demand!).

I'm clear that we were VERY lucky that nothing worse happened to him. And as traumatic and scary as it was for me to witness the accident, I'm SO grateful that I was there and was able to take care of my husband. Still, in the quiet moments when there's nothing else going on in my head, I can't help but replay the sight of him rolling down the street, and it's still really scary. Hopefully it'll stop soon.